


From His Clutches

by timeywimeygalaxy



Category: Sanders Sides, Sanders Sides (Web Series), Thomas Sanders, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Abuse, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Gaslighting, M/M, Physical Abuse, i dont really know tags, let me know if I've missed anything
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-03
Updated: 2018-05-08
Packaged: 2019-03-26 15:27:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13860621
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/timeywimeygalaxy/pseuds/timeywimeygalaxy
Summary: Patton awoke to a fervent knock at his bedroom door, he blearily glanced at his alarm clock.3.00am? who’s knocking at 3.00am?





	1. 3.00am [RE-UPLOAD]

**Author's Note:**

> Hiya! so I've been nervous about posting this for a while but I finally took the plunge! this is my first fanfic in about 8 years and my first sanders sides fic so I hope you like it! I watched a bunch of sanders sides videos before writing this so I'm sorry if its crap xD or if I haven't done the characters justice, but I've had this story in my head for a while though I'm not sure if I'm going to continue it or not but let me know if you'd like me too! ^_^ also grammar and punctuation is not my strong point so sorry for that as well xD also sorry for this being a short first chapter, it's more a prologue.

 

Patton awoke to a fervent knock at his bedroom door, he blearily glanced at his alarm clock.

_3.00am? who’s knocking at 3.00am?_

He clumsily grabbed his cat sweater, pulled it over his head and headed for the door.

As soon as he opened it however his sleepy smile fell from his face. Standing in front of him was Virgil he was a complete mess, out of breath his hair disheveled a bruise already forming on his cheek and a split lip.

“Virgil? What ha-“ was all Patton could muster before the anxious trait grabbed the front of his sweater and broke down into his arms.

Patton caught him as he led them both into his room holding him tightly, sat Virgil on the bed and grabbed a first aid kit from the bathroom. He slowly crouched down in front of him as to not startle the poor boy anymore, he had clearly been through the mill tonight.

He took and antiseptic wipe from the box and gently tended to Virgil’s wounds knowing he would talk when he was ready, he hissed at the touch and managed to whisper.

“De-deceit” his breath was shaky as tears streamed down his face leaving tracks in his now smudged make up.

“Oh kiddo… he did this to you?” Virgil nodded.

Patton sighed as he put down the wipe and cupped Virgil’s cheek he wiped away a stray tear, his heart broke for him he just wanted to wrap him in his arms and hold him until the pain melted away.

“You know this isn’t right?” Patton said in a stern yet loving tone, Virgil nodded.

_Oh he knew alright._

“I-I know” Virgil replied Patton gave him a sympathetic smile.

“Well, you’re not going back there, you can stay here” Virgil looked hopeful for a moment before darkness settled on his features again as his breathing became shallow.

“Bu- but what if he-“ knowing what was happening Patton interjected.

“Remember he can’t get into our rooms, these are our own safe spaces, you’re safe here Virgil” knowing he was on the verge of a panic attack, hearing this information seemed to help calm him.

Patton noticed Virgil was doing the exercise that the other sides taught him, he inhaled for four, held for seven, then exhaled for eight as he did this, morality pulled the anxious side closer and hummed a soothing tune whilst stroking his hair.

Comforted by this Virgil laid his head into Patton’s lap, as soon as his head was down, his eyes instantly became heavy and soon enough he fell into a peaceful sleep listening to Patton’s humming, not seeing the tears forming in the heart’s eyes.

 

* * *

 

“Why do you bother them? They don’t care about you, you will never be apart of there little group” Deceit’s words rang in his head he was crouching on the ground as he looked around all he saw was darkness, everything was pitch black as tears welled in his eyes again.

_This can’t-_

_Can’t breathe_

_Can’t breathe_

“You’re nothing to them”

“I can take care of you”

He clamped his hands over his ears trying to drown out the snake.

“Shut up! SHUT UP! You’re LYING!” he cried out and curled into himself trying to make himself as small as possible hoping it would stop everything.

Everything was silent. Except for Virgil’s sobbing.

When he eventually dared to take his face out of his arms he looked up to see a figure towering over him and it felt like slow motion a fist coming down on his face.  
  
Virgil screamed as he bolted upright in bed, beads of sweat had formed on his forehead and his eyes stung trying to adjust to the assault of light on them. He scanned this environment forgetting where he was momentarily before everything came flooding back from the previous night.

He knew he was in Patton’s room, but where was Patton? He reached a hand to his cheek and winced slightly.

The door clicked open and the anxious side flinched but eased up when he saw Patton enter with a humungous tray of…. pancakes?

They smelled amazing and with everything that had been happening, It wasn’t the first time he had forgotten to eat recently.

“Afternoon kiddo!”

Afternoon? Of course, he had slept most of the day he suddenly felt a pang of guilt, Patton had and was taking such good care of him and he hadn’t thanked him once, he watched as the tray was laid on his lap.

“You looked so peaceful I didn’t want to wake you” Patton smiled at him, Virgil gave a half smile back.

“Tha-thank you for…for everything” he spluttered out the words, without missing a beat Patton responded lovingly.

“You don’t need to say thank you Virge, we’re here for you no matter what, you’re family remember?” he squeezed his shoulder gently as the anxious trait was biting back tears at this point feeling so undeserving of the heart’s affections.

“I-“ before he could protest he found pancakes already stuffed in his mouth.

“Eat up!” Patton laughed as Virgil acquiesced and demolished the plate within minutes, beaming at him as he took the empty plate and asked.

“You want to go downstairs and see the others?” Virgil nodded in agreement feeling a little bit more at ease for the first time in months.

“I’ll let you get refreshed and you can come downstairs when you’re ready?” Patton said and Virgil nodded as he watched him leave the room.

Once the door clicked shut he jumped out of the bed and snapped up his hoodie from the back of the chair near the desk, as he slipped it on he felt a sense of warmth wash over him and he felt his shoulders relaxh. He made his way over to the bathroom mirror and for the first time in months he found his own reflection.

What he saw back made his stomach drop his sunken brown eyes stared back at him they looked devoid of any happiness, any spark he once had.

His make up had pretty much gone due to the crying the night before, he touched his fingers to the mirror as he examined his features staring at his pale, now gaunt skin with his cheekbones poking through.

He knew he was skinny but his weight had never been like this before, no wonder Patton made him so many pancakes!

He looked at his injuries from the night prior and despite them still looking bad, Patton had done a pretty good job in tending to them. He had no idea how he would explain them to other sides though, in hindsight he kind of already knew how they would react.

Logan would pick his words very carefully, but Virgil would already catch on with him basically saying in his own way that he has to leave deceit and he knows he would be right even though he didn’t want to face that reality.

Not that he didn’t want too.

_He was scared too._

And Roman?

He would go down there and stab deceit one hundred times over with his sword, that thought made Virgil smile but as quickly as it came it left.

_I shouldn’t have thought that. Stupid so stupid! I love him…. Don’t I?_

Could he even call it love anymore?

He didn’t want to think about it right now and shook the thoughts aside he attempted to focus on the here and now, looking at his bruised face he conjured up some a bottle of pale foundation and a pot of black eyeshadow as he did his best to cover up his bruise and put his make up on, as for his split lip-

_I walked into a door._

Though he didn’t want to lie to them he really wasn’t ready for all the questions.

Touching up the last of eye makeup he took one last look in the mirror, out of his peripheral vision he could’ve sworn he saw a glint of yellow he whirled around as his heartbeat suddenly increased and his breathing becoming shallow, but he faced nothing.

No one.

_Am I going crazy?_

Virgil clutched the edge of the sink trying to steady himself, whilst doing his breathing exercise he felt his pulse gradually come back down.

_It couldn’t have been him, Patton said he couldn’t-_

“Virgil?” A knock at the bedroom door made the anxious trait jump as Patton’s voice trailed into the room.

“You ok in their kiddo?” Patton asked gently.

“Yeah, be- be right out” Virgil replied He took one last look around the bathroom and in the mirror before nodding to himself.

_Just imagined it….Right?_


	2. Before the storm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiya! Chapter 2 is finally here, i had to re-upload chapter 1 as i added loads more too it and rewrote it to end on a cliffhanger but man I took ages with this one as inspiration was hard to come by and I feel that it is a bit of a filler but I needed to write this in order to set up the story going forward and i had a really hard time trying to write for logan but yeah here it is, I hope you like it, the next chapter is gonna feature aLOT more angst! 
> 
> If you like to follow my Tumblr it's Timewimeygalaxy

 “Yeah, be- be right out” Virgil replied.

Patton raised his hand to knock again, but the door suddenly opened albeit aggressively and the anxious trait stepped out. Patton’s expression quickly changed from happy to concern.

“Everything ok?” Virgil forced a smile, and Patton noticed he seemed distracted.

“Fine” Virgil replied flatly, the moral trait eyed him suspiciously, but he decided not to push further.

“Okay, well I know you just ate breakfast, but Logan is making us lunch downstairs if you’d like any?”

Virgil forced a smile as both sides make their way down to the commons.

The smell of lunch wafted through the area, approaching the table Virgil saw Logan at the stove and Roman sitting on the couch singing along very loudly to a Disney’s Moana that was playing on the TV.

“Ah afternoon my chemically imbalanced friend!” Roman practically shouted it at him above the film noise, as he made his way over to Virgil and enveloped him in a hug. Virgil stiffened at the sudden touch and sign of affection.

_Stop being stupid it’s only princey he would never hurt you!_

He slowly relaxed into it and gave a half smile as he awkwardly hugged back.

“Hey, sir sing a lot” As they pulled back from the embrace Roman’s face fell.

“Virgil, what happened to your lip?”

_Aaaand there it is._

Roman turned down the volume down on the tv with a flick of his wrist, as Logan stopped what he was doing at the stove and made his way over.

“You seem to have an abrasion, is everything ok?” the logical side enquired.

_No._

“Yeah”

The anxious trait gave a quick glance to Patton who he could tell was urging him to tell the others, but Virgil simply wasn’t ready. He knew he could trust Patton though and he would tell the others later when he felt he could. Virgil quickly gave a very forced smile and cleared his throat to continue.

“Yeah, I’m alright guys, I just walked into a door…”

“Sure, you didn’t say… _run_ into it?” Roman joked as the tension seemed to dissipate.

Virgil forced a laugh “I’d still look better than you”

The prince made an offended noise but seemed satisfied by the answer, Logan, however, eyed him suspiciously for a moment as he looked between him and Patton who quickly grabbed some plates and was setting the table for lunch seemingly avoiding Logan’s watchful gaze.

“Smells good, what we having?” Virgil asked, breaking Logan’s gaze on Patton.

He made his way back to the stove to check on the pot with water in that was nearly bubbling over, he stirred it as he spoke.

“Ah, yes I’ve prepared us some-“ before he could finish the sentence Logan let out a small high pitched yelp, which made Virgil jump as he saw Roman picking him up from behind his waist and spun him away from the stove before planting a kiss on his cheek.

Logan looked absolutely appalled and almost offended at this sudden show of affection, his glasses askew he clears his throat and straightened his glasses and tie.

“Roman, please it is not wise to do that near a lit flame”

“What! I have vowed to show my love for my nerd AT ALL TIMES!” he said this making a grand gesture with his arms, as Logan pinched the bridge of his nose. Virgil noticed he was trying to suppress a small smile though.

“Awwh you guys are so cute!” Patton squealed at them as he held his hands to his face in delight. though Logan and Roman had only recently gotten together (a long time coming in Patton’s and Virgil’s eyes) Logan seemed to have trouble adjusting to the prince’s sudden bursts of affection.

“Please, Patton don’t encourage him” Logan sighed.

“No! DO ENCOURAGE ME!” Roman’s voice boomed across the room as he beamed at all of them he was clearly ecstatic about his new relationship and giggled like a child as Logan rolled his eyes.

He grabbed the plates from the table and started dishing out the food as the other sides sat down, the smell of spaghetti bolognaise wafted to Virgil’s nose.

 _Man, that smelt good!_ Virgil thought to himself

“Logan this looks amazing!” Patton gushed as the plates were all laid down to them.

“Thank you, Patton, I’m happy to accommodate” Logan smiled at him.

As they all dug into the meal, Patton asked the other sides.

“So what’s everyone’s plans for the day?”

Roman beamed as he stood up with some spaghetti still hanging out his mouth and quickly drew his sword like a Disney prince posing for a portrait, one leg leaning on the chair.

“I have a day planned of grand adventures with my beloved!” the creative side talked with his hands, but Logan interjected.

“I’m sorry Roman but I have work that needs attending too”

Roman’s face fell slightly but his smile quickly returned.

“oh come on pocket protector you can do it later, we have a kingdom to save!”

“On the contrary Roman, Thomas has many appointments that he needs to get done before a certain time frame, I can’t simply run off on one of your adventures”

If Roman was somewhat hurt by this comment, then he hid it very well. Virgil thought this to himself as he watched creativity fold his arms and pout.

“but” Logan continued “if it’s any consolation then perhaps one of the other sides can accompany you” this suggestion made Roman beam again as he looked at the other two, Patton looked at him sadly.

“Sorry kiddo I have things I need to take care off as well” Patton glanced at Virgil as he said this the anxious side seemed confused by this but before he could worry, Roman turned to him

“fine! Virge?”

“What? Me?” Virgil seemed startled by Roman’s request as he finished his food.

“Yeah how about it hot topic? We can venture into unknown lands, rescue the princess- or prince, and SAVE THE DAY!...AGAIN!”

_Geez, could princey get anymore…. grand?_

“uhh…I don’t know-“ Virgil seemed hesitant

_There are endless amounts of things that could go wrong, I can count 100 right now._

“Come on virge maybe it’ll be good for you, get you out of the mindscape for a while” Patton encouraged smiling at him and Virgil eyed him warily.

_Why does he want me to go? Surely, he was worried too with everything that happened last night…_

_But maybe…it could be ok? It would be good for me to see some sunlight at least._

“Fine” Virgil droned as soon as the words left his mouth Roman grabbed his hand and was practically dragging him to the stairs, before he was up to the top Virgil yelled thanks to Logan for the food as the other sides heard Roman’s faint voice shout

“Onwards, J Delightful!”


	3. Shadows

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ANGST TRAINS ALL ABOARD! Hoo boy! this is my longest chapter of this fic so far! I’m sorry this took so long! This chapter has a bucketful of angst so I’m sorry in advance! But yes it’s time for Roman and Virgil’s trip into the imagination realm and let’s just say things do not go as planned. Like at all.

“Onwards JDelightful!”

Roman bellowed as he swung open the door to the imagination realm he ran in and Virgil hesitantly followed.

What he saw made his jaw drop, his was met with lush green fields dotted with colours of the rainbow, showing patches of wildflowers that stretched into the distance in front of him, the smell of fresh grass and lavender filled his nostrils as he inhaled the scents making him feel more relaxed, a towering castle stood on the horizon with a beautiful mid-day sun setting behind it, and a vast forest spread around the edge of the citadel separating it and the field they stood in. 

Virgil hadn’t been on one of Roman’s adventures in so long he’d forgotten the beauty of the worlds that Roman could create, he stared in awe as a gentle breeze ruffled his bangs and the sunlight hit his face, Roman looked very pleased with himself as he approached.

“Enjoying the view?” he inquired smirking at him.

Once Virgil manage to pick his jaw up off the floor he stuttered through some kind of response.

“Roman…it’s -this is-“ he rubbed his neck feeling sheepish and gave a lopsided smile to the creative side, Roman understood at once grinning back.

“So what’s the plan?” Virgil asked and Roman whirled around to face him once more smiling earnestly.

“Well first things first, we need transport” Roman snapped his fingers and two horses appeared in front of them, one was of nearly jet black in colour with soft brown eyes and some white markings it was like his fur had been splattered with white paint, the other horse a beige one with a black diamond shape on his forehead.

Virgil took a step back in surprise as Roman continued he stroked one of the horses mane “I’ve been told that Horses are used to help people with anxiety, it helps them feel more at ease, Equine assisted therapy”.

Virgil let out a small smirk “Impressive. Did Logan tell you all this?”

Roman let out an offended gasp “I’ll have you know that I delve into his library occasionally!”

The anxious side scoffed at him, as Roman pouted.

“Anyway” he made his way over to Virgil and gently took his hand his “Here” Roman coaxed as he led his hand over to the dark horse’s face and gently patted his forehead, although his head was screaming that this was going to go wrong, or it was dangerous, patting the horse’s head as it neighed and the feeling of roman’s warm hand on his calmed his thoughts.

“There you go, he likes you” Roman beamed at him as he made his way over to his own horse.

Virgil stood there stroking the horse’s soft head and his mane, he smiled a genuine smile, roman had been right this horse’s presence did seem to calm him, the horse suddenly blew out of its nose, Virgil had to admit it did make him flinch slightly but the horse seemed to recognize this as he nuzzled his head into Virgil’s hand, the anxious trait grinned.

“You’re a good boy aren’t you” he beamed at him as the horse whinnied, he let out a small chuckle.

Roman made his way over with his horse’ reins in his hands,“Shall we get going?” he said this as he started to mount his horse, Virgil began to feel the fear rising in him again.

“Where?” he hugged his horse close to him as if already sensing danger.

“Not to worry, just to the castle, we need to rescue the prince or princess that is residing there, that’s the quest!”

“Or?” Virgil looked confused, Roman added quickly “I haven’t decided yet”  

A realization hit him “You’re just making this up as you go along aren’t you?”

Roman looked sheepish for a second before his expression became confident again.

“Yep but I do it brilliantly” he declared puffing his chest out, Virgil rolled his eyes.

“let’s just get this over with princey” he groaned as he slowly mounted his horses grasping the reins tightly in his pale hands.

 

* * *

The two came to a gravel path near the opening of the forest, up close it looked a lot more menacing Virgil thought as he glanced at Roman hoping he felt the same, but he was beaming as he looked at Virgil’s apprehension his smile fell.

“are you alright with this? We can go back if you’re not comfortable” Virgil exhaled a breath.

“n-no it’s fine” Roman observed him for a moment before conjuring up something that glinted as the sunlight hit it, Virgil recognised it to be a sword with a golden hilt, black and red jewels were encrusted in the handle, the creative side handed it to him as he felt the weight of it in his hands.

“Just in case” Roman nodded to the sword now in Virgil’s hand.

“No need to worry I’ll be with you” Roman expressed earnestly as he smiled at Virgil who forced a smile back as they ventured into the forest.

_He had a bad feeling about this._

The sounds of the horses hoofs echoed through the dark forest, unfortunately the trees seemed to branch over into themselves making everything look much more sinister than it properly was, the darkness that surrounded them seem to be partially broken by streams of sunlight coming in at certain points within.

If it wasn’t for that then they would be in pitch darkness, though none of this helped the anxious trait keep his thoughts at bay, as every sound other than the horse made his head snap to the noise expecting to see something jump out and attack them, he gripped his sword tightly, trying to control his breathing,

_Everything is out to kill us._

_What the fuck was that noise?_

_The wind? enemies?_

_Oh god, this was a bad idea why did I-_

He felt something warm on his hand and it pulled him out of his spiraling thoughts, he looked up and through his bangs saw Roman smiling at him sincerely.

“how you doing V?” Virgil simply nodded.

“it’s okay we’re not far now, just a bit farther” Roman explained, they slowly came to a coven of trees a small stream ran through the middle of it, as the horses entered the water,  Roman glanced around suspiciously, Virgil felt his heart quicken.

“What is it?” he asked hoping to god it was nothing bad, “Nothing… i.. I just thought I saw something” Roman scanned the area squinting into a certain spot opposite the stream, he then shook his head and his gaze fell back to Virgil with what looked like a forced smile.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to worry you vir-“ Roman was cut off when sudden black wisps of black smoke? Shadows? Virgil couldn’t tell they were too quick to even get a good glimpse, the tendrils weaved in and out of the horses as they clearly got spooked they whinnied and bucked off the two sides from their backs and ran.

Roman landed in the stream and Virgil landed on the bank of dirt the air felt like it had been knocked from him, as the tendrils tried to wrap themselves around both sides, Virgil saw Roman swinging his sword cutting through them, he could see he was trying to reach the anxious side Virgil felt his whole body shake as he tried to get his breathing under control but the shadows were now obscuring his vision, he felt his throat closing up as he heard a muffled voice shout “RUN!” Roman was shouting at him and with all his strength he grabbed the sword next to him and felt his legs drag him.

_What the hell dude!_

_Are you just leaving him? Some hero you are._

He felt like he wasn’t even in his own head, like he was watching himself running from above, he knew he was dissociating but he kept running that’s all he knew how to do right now, as he bolted back into the trees and the partial darkness, glancing behind him to see if the shadows were following him but he stopped when he just saw the stream in the distance but Roman had gone, Virgil panted as he bit his lip.

_Shit._

_Oh, fuck you should’ve helped him!_

_Coward!_

Virgil closed his eyes biting back tears,

He was now on his own in a middle of this forest that roman had created, with no idea of what creatures lay within these trees.

Where was Roman? Oh god, he hoped he was ok.

What if something awful had happened to him? It would be his fault he just ran! He had to try and do something, try and find him! Rescue the prince as Roman would put it. Virgil gripped his sword close to him as he started to make his way through the forest trying to keep his sanity intact.

* * *

_Breathe, 1,2,3,4_

_Breathe_

The exercise helped as he felt his head level out, it felt like he had been walking for hours, he thought of the idea of marking the trees with his sword he carved a small V into each one he passed hoping Roman would see them and hoping it would keep him on the right track, if there even was a right track, at least it would stop him going in circles though he didn’t really know where he was going he just knew he needed to find Roman.

This quest was over they both needed to get out of here and fast, whatever those creatures were they weren’t friendly, he wiped his forehead with his hoodie sleeve as he came to a crossroad between two trees, he marked them with his sword as he tried to decide which route to take, out of his peripheral vision he saw a shadow.

_Shit!_

He whirled around and held his sword firmly, ready to attack, what he did see made his blood turn to ice, the color drained from his already pale face, his heart rate spiked as he tried to control his breathing he gripped his sword more tightly.

“Y-You can-can’t be here” Virgil stammered through these words, trying and failing to hide the fear in his voice as he trembled at the sight of who stood before him, his whole body shaking as he gripped the hilt of the sword with such force that his nails dug into his palm as he stared at the yellow-clad side. 

“I’m here because you made it so” Deceit crooned as he slowly removed the yellow gloves he glared at the anxious trait who was already shrinking away, looking around for a way to escape, clearly not liking the distance that Virgil was trying to create between them Deceit snapped his fingers and Virgil’s breath hitched as he came nose to nose with the snake-faced man who grabbed his wrist holding the sword.

Coming to his senses briefly he tried to jerk his hand away but deceit dug his nails in, his legs felt like lead as he dropped to his knees the anxious side whimpered as his weapon fell out of his hand and looked down to see the skin had been broken and droplets of blood started seeping out.

He tried to look away, he didn’t want to see the fury in his (ex?) boyfriend’s eyes, but a gloved hand grabbed his chin and forced his face up, Virgil’s eyes met hostile yellow ones.

“you shouldn’t have left me anxiety” Deceit growled as he dug his nails harder, tears streamed down Virgil’s face.

“I-I’m so-sorry” he sobbed.

“I thought you loved me but then you kept going to see  _them_ and you kept breaking my heart again and again, after everything I’ve done for you” Deceit’s words hit him like a knife.

“n-no…i..” he was at his mercy now, no weapon and Roman was nowhere in sight.

“i-it-i-didn’t mean to- please…you-you’re h-h hurting me” he choked on his own words trying to block out the pain from his wrist he felt a sudden blow and his face felt like it was on fire as he crumpled into the tree opposite, Virgil scrambled to his feet.

_Run. Fucking run!_

The yellow-clad side advanced upon him as Virgil felt his legs move without telling them too, he started sprinting through the trees , stray branches whipping at his face, he glanced back to check if Deceit had taken pursuit as he looked back in front of him he saw a yellow figure standing a bit in front of him.

He skidded to a halt and braced himself for hitting the side but instead he phased right through him, like he was a ghost he hit the floor on his hands and knees as he looked around confused and panting Deceit gave a sly smile and crouched down next to the anxious side who tried to shuffle away but his back hit a tree his eyes wide like a deer caught in headlights.

“I-i don’t understand” he panted, deceit chuckled as he started to stoke Virgil’s face, Virgil stared ahead, his whole body shaking with terror, his throat was closing up again deceit’s face was inches from his he could feel his breath on his cheek as he spoke quietly though Virgil could sense the undertones of rage in his voice.

“you see my dear, in this realm I’m not corporeal, the more you fear me, the more I can hurt you” he chuckled as he watched Virgil’s eyes grow wide, Deceit stood up and whirled around his clasping his hands together with a menacing gaze and a gleam in his yellow eyes.

“So, should I give you a head start or-“ in an instant, a sword broke through his chest from behind, Virgil screamed as he scrambled onto his feet ready to run again, as deceit’s body vanished into black smoke he saw who was standing behind it.

“Ro-Roman!” he never thought he’d be this happy to see the dorky prince, Roman dashed to Virgil’s side and enveloped him in a tight and warm embrace.

“oh Virgil I’m so sorry! Are you ok? your wrist, your face!” Virgil’s head was spinning, too many questions all at once!

“Roman…”

The prince realized he was being too much, he let him out of the embrace as he watched him intently.

“I’m sorry…Virgil” the anxious side nodded his head, “I know” he croaked as he pulled his hoodie closer around him, Roman was being genuine he didn’t mean for any of this to happen, but he felt the tears come regardless as he fell back into the prince’s warm embrace and felt roman sink them both out as they fell softly into the creative sides room.

The familiar scent of roses filled his nostrils as he sobbed into Roman’s tunic, he felt gentle hands stroking his hair and a soothing voice broke through his sobs, he could hear Roman’s voice cracking as well.

“shhh, it’s going to be ok” Virgil’s breathing was ragged and he hiccupped a few times between sobs, the embrace was extremely comforting to the anxious side and he was thankful that Roman was just holding him and allowing him to let out all of his emotions, even if the anxious thoughts in his head were screaming at him, he gripped the prince’s tunic tighter.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr is timeywimeygalaxy, if you want to follow I post updates on there first.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil talks with Logan about relationships.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow! it's been a while! so sorry about that, with my last uni assignment and dwindling inspiration did not help but the next chapter is finally here! and a little platonic prinxiety and analogical for y'all. :)

It felt like hours had passed before Virgil finally stopped crying whereas in reality, it was probably about 20 minutes, he looked at Roman’s tear-stained tunic through his blurred eyes and felt a pang of guilt.

“I’m sorry Roman I-“ he was cut off as Roman hugged him tighter.

“you have nothing to be sorry for virge” Virgil slowly detached himself from the prince’s hug, he exhaled a deep breath, and felt an immense relief to be in Roman's room away from the forest away from  _everything_ , he wiped his eyes with the sleeve of his hoodie and sniffed as he sensed Roman watching him intensely.

He glanced over to the royal as he felt shame creep up his neck as if sensing what he was feeling Roman spoke.

“you have nothing to be sorry for” he repeated and continued.

“I should be the one apologizing Virgil, I’m sorry for dragging you there, but you did the right thing when I told you run we couldn’t have both of us getting caught” Roman’s eyes flooded with guilt again as they stared at each other.

“don’t worry princey, really I’ll be fine, I know you didn’t mean for any of that to happen” Virgil tried to get his voice under control and stop it from cracking every five seconds he didn’t want to break down again, Roman sensed this, and pulled Virgil into another protective hug as a comfortable silence fell between them, finding comfort in each other’s arms as they let time pass for a while before Virgil felt ready to ask the question that had been plaguing him since their return, he slowly pulled away from Roman’s embrace.

“he- hey Roman….” Virgil inquired.

“hmm?” the royal whispered and the anxious side continued.

“what happened to you? What were those- those things?”   Roman gulped as if he’d been dreading these questions since they got back,  but he knew Virgil would want answers, after all it was his fault everything went… _awry,_ his voice sounded hoarse when he started to answer.

“well, those creatures, they don’t typically dwell in the forests,  and they feed of off what you fear the most, they can manifest themselves as your deepest fears, and if you’re scared of them then that makes them impregnatable to harm, it becomes like a ghost, they can hurt you physically but you have no power, no way of fighting back as long as your fear dominates you” Roman explained as things started to click into place in Virgil’s head.  

_That’s why he….it could hurt me?_

“As soon as you let go of that dread, then you can hurt it, hence why it became solid when I drove my sword through it,  _I_ wasn’t the one that feared it” Roman disclosed as he felt the royal’s eyes meet his with a knowing stare,  Virgil felt his head start to spin again.

_Focus, you need to focus!_

But Virgil’s eyes widened when he was hit another realization.

_Roman had created them._

“but…but how did you-?”

 _“_ I didn’t mean too!” Roman blurted out putting his hands gently on Virgil’s shoulders, pleading with his eyes.

“I swear!, I just- one day I felt horrible and I went into the realm and they were the creatures that showed up and I just…” he trailed off not knowing how to finish the sentence, Virgil understood though as he squeezed his shoulder.

“It’s fine princey, I get it” Roman looked relieved, yet he still felt guilty, he was meant to protect Virgil not cause him more harm, he felt the anxious side break free of their embrace as he stands up he dusts some foliage of himself, Roman followed suit doing the same, man their clothes really did need to be cleaned.

With a wave of his hand Roman had made their clothes spotless whilst also completely cleaning up their wounds in the process, Virgil smiled at him.

“thanks, Roman” Roman bowed to him.

“It’s the least I can do” and Virgil chuckled.

* * *

 

Tossing and turning in the bed that Patton had made up for him in the spare room they had in there area of the mindscape, the anxious side couldn’t sleep, that wasn’t anything new but what was new was that he wasn’t with the dark sides anymore he wasn’t with Deceit therefore just getting up and wandering the mindscape didn’t seem like an option to him.

Even though he knew the others probably wouldn’t mind if he did so, he still felt that gnawing feeling in his stomach getting used to being able to be himself here was going to take time and he hated that, groaning in exasperation he kicked the covers off and crept towards the door, quietly opening it as to not to wake the other sides, he tiptoed out, creeping down the hallway, he saw that Roman and Patton’s doors were closed and no light peeked out from underneath. 

 _They must be asleep_.

He made his way further down the corridor, noticing a faint light from the bottom of the stairs he sneaked down silently peeking beneath the bannisters railing to see Logan sitting on the couch with a hot beverage in one hand and a book in the other, he laid down the mug on the coffee table and propped his legs up. 

 _He looks so relaxed_   Virgil thought smiling to himself liking this new side of Logan he was seeing.

For someone who seemed so uptight a lot of the time it was nice to see him actually give himself a break once in a while, Virgil crouched on the stairs for a moment just watching the scene, his eyes widened when he realised he was kind of being a creeper, so he tried too as silently as he could make his way back up the stairs as to not disturb Logan and his reading time.

“Evening Virgil”

The anxious side froze on the stairs, glancing at Logan who hadn’t looked up from his book.

_Shit._

He closed his eyes as he slowly turned to make his way down the stairs.

_Now you’ve done it, he’s going to get angry at you for interrupting him._

“uh hi…I’m sorry I didn’t mean to interrupt-“ he mumbled.

“Nonsense, I had just finished the last chapter for the night, anything on your mind?” Logan asked gently he could see that Virgil was not feeling himself, or more of himself than usual depending on the way you look at the situation.

Virgil took a small breath for a moment and glanced up at Logan expecting to see fury on his face but instead he was met with a warm smile, Logan patted the couch and coaxed him over setting his book down on the table, he was hesitant at first but eventually found his legs moving there anyway, gingerly sitting down next to him, the logical trait looked at him with eyes of concern.

“Can I get you anything Virgil, tea, coffee?” he offered.

“uh no…no thank you” Virgil replied stuffing his hands into his hoodie pockets glancing around to room, he felt he was making things awkward, but Logan seemed comfortable enough.

“Is there anything you would like to talk about? Is there a reason why you’re up at this ungodly hour?”

_Could ask you the same thing bookworm._

Virgil was silent for a moment fiddling with his hoodie togs, he thought back to breakfast that morning seeing Logan and Roman happy and it gave him butterflies, why was it never that easy with Dee?

“y-you and Roman?” he asked slightly wincing at asking something that sounded quite personal, but Logan simply smiled.

“yes, we have been together for a few months now, is there a particular reason why you’re thinking about our relationship?” It sounded so blunt the way Logan worded it which made Virgil flinch slightly, Logan saw this and started to backtrack.

“my apologies Virgil, I simply meant-“

“How does it work?” Virgil interrupted and looked away sheepishly.

Logan closed his mouth and let out a small chuckle.

“Honestly I ask myself that same question sometimes, though Virgil I do believe you’ve heard of the term “opposites attract” “

Virgil nodded and listened intently, he didn’t expect to be talking to Logan about this of all things but here they were.

“but we seem to strike a good balance within each other, I can teach him to be more knowledgeable when he’s out on quests in his realm and he teaches me to be more…. carefree I think is the word I’m looking for”

Virgil smiled thinking about how sweet their relationship was…. _what the hell had happened to his?_

“Judging from your expression I can only guess that that is not the case for you and deceit?” Logan seemed a bit hesitant when asking this, but Virgil couldn’t deny he was right he tried to think of a response but came up empty.

Logan simply gave him a sympathetic smile “I’ve only been in a relationship for a short amount of time now but from what I’ve seen and read, both parties have to invest the same amount of effort in order for it to work”

Virgil remained quiet.

“It may not be my place to say this Virgil, but I do believe you deserve better than…”

 _Better than Deceit?_  Virgil thought, feeling slightly defensive about the situation there was a whole other side to him that the others just never saw, he could be sweet and caring and loving.

He was…he was- there’s that word Virgil thought to himself he  _was_  caring and sweet and loving….but then all that changed when he had started hanging out more with the light sides, the anxious trait pulled his focus back to Logan who had paused looking at Virgil with concern and he knew he was picking his words carefully as to not offend him either that or holding back from completely bashing on Deceit.

“-than your current situation, now I don’t fully understand what has happened and that is completely up to you if you would ever like to explain but for now I can see whole heartily that you are not happy and as far as I am aware happiness, trust and communication are the foundations of a healthy relationship”

Virgil’s eyes were welling up now,  _goddam Logan and his knowledge._

“Please know I say none of this to cause you upset, I just simply want to see you happy”

The anxious side laughed slightly as he wiped his eyes with the sleeve of his hoodie.

“no…no you’re fine, it’s just-“

He sighed a shaky breath

Did he really want to say it? No, he couldn’t…not yet anyway.

He sniffed, and Logan put a gentle hand on his shoulder and squeezed it, he may not fully understand these kinds of feelings, but he knew how to comfort people… in his own way.

“so, you and Roman are happy?” Virgil asked.

“Oh, very much so” Logan gave a small smile.

A silence fell between them again before Logan spoke again

“I hope you don’t me saying this, but I saw you and Patton coming down to breakfast together this morning and I couldn’t help but wonder-”

“uh yeah…he just was helping me is all” Virgil felt a small blush creep across his cheeks when saying this and his heart fluttered a little, this didn’t help that his stomach was already tying itself in knots due to guilt, he would never cheat on Dee but he was terrified to go back and end it, what if he would never let him back here again? What if he hurt the others? What if-

His eyes had glazed over and Logan’s voice cut through his racing thoughts, he was brought back to reality.

“Virgil?, I apologize I didn’t mean to cause you any distress”

Virgil stood up a bit too quickly.

“huh? oh uh no it’s fine, I’m going to try and sleep” he mumbled out this sentence as Logan nodded his head.

“A wise decision, I think I will do the same” he grabbed his book and mug as he followed the anxious trait to the stairs, reaching the landing Logan turned to him and smiled.

“Goodnight Virgil” Virgil waved his hand and said the same before watching Logan entering his bedroom and closing the door.

Making his way along the rest of the corridor he slowly came to a halt outside Patton’s room, Logan’s words kept replaying in his head.

 _Happiness?_   Patton did make him happy, more so than he’s felt in a long time…he couldn’t sleep in that room, not on his own…

Would Patton mind? He hated sleeping on his own now due to restlessness and…. other things.

What If he got angry for waking him?

What if he said no?

Inhaling deeply he slowly raised his fist to Patton’s door but before he could knock, the door swung open slowly and quietly.

Virgil stood there for a moment eyes wide, his knuckle still hanging in the air to find Patton standing in the doorway smiling softly donning a very messy bed head, noticing Virgil’s scared expression.

“sorry! I woke up a while ago and heard footsteps, is everything ok virge?” Patton looked a little nervous and was…was he blushing? Virgil cursed the low lighting of the room for not letting him see properly, he bit his lip and rubbed his neck sheepishly.

“would- would it be alright if I stayed with you tonight?” he stammered, and Patton’s eyes changed from concern to warmth.

“of course kiddo!” He gently pulled Virgil in the room enveloping him in a protective hug, he smelled of freshly baked cookies and it felt so safe in Patton’s arms that the anxious side never wanted to leave them.

This felt so… _nice_ he thought to himself and just feeling the warmth and affection of the other side helped ease his negative thoughts.


End file.
